Premature Word Ejaculation

Don't act like this is your first rodeo

For many, screenwriting is nothing more than a series of premature word ejaculations.  You're hit by a brilliant idea, and in a fever inspired state, you race to get it into treatment form.
Boom.  Wad blown.

You rush to bang out a first draft of the sucker.  Boom.  Another wad.

Rewrite.  Boom.  Scramble to get feedback.  Boom.  Another rewrite and polish.  Boom.  Then off to market.  SPLAT!

Stop.  Doing.  That. 

The point is, by the time your script is in the bag, you've prematurely spewed your creative load several times over.  Your script is like a lady, and she deserves way better than that.  Think about it.  If your hot script got together with all the other hot scripts, those other hot scripts would tell your smoking hot script to dump your sorry ass 'cause you're treating her like a two dollar hooker turning tricks behind the garbage container.

Your script deserves a writer who takes the time to do things right and will get her where she needs to be, a writer with discipline and patience mixed in with that insatiable passion.  When you spew all over her in a rush to satisfy your adrenaline fueled story desires, she ain't getting what she needs, and it sure as hell ain't your best.  It's your creative spooge.  And do you really want your reputation and career built on spooge?  Do you really want everybody to think your wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am is the best you can do?

Nobody wants that.

Premature word ejaculation is the number one screenwriting sin.  We're all guilty of it at some point.  Some of us do it a lot.  Some of us build entire careers on it.  But it's still spooge.  And the very worst sin of the premature word ejaculation kind, is the very first you'll be tempted to commit to a script.

The idea spooge.

The idea.  That little thing that's not even a half-formed concept.  It's just a spark.  A scene, a scenario, a flash of images, a bizarre pairing, a single line of dialogue... something.  Not quite tangible, like a trace of perfume in the air, or a glimpse of an inner thigh as legs cross.  Some tiny magical thing that explodes in your brain as insatiable NEED.

A seasoned lover writer doesn't jump all over that need and bang the crap out of it then roll over and fall asleep.  That's how you end up a bad joke on a bathroom wall  in the slush pile.  A pro knows that no matter how brilliant the idea may very well be, It's worth taking the time to explore and discover and build on.  It's not going anywhere.  There's no need to rush.  

Sure, it's new and exciting, and the urge to throw yourself head over heels into it is over-bleeping-whelming, but now is the time to use every ounce of willpower you have.  If the idea is truly brilliant as is, you may very well end up with a fantastic script even if you rush into it now, but...  If the idea really is truly brilliant, isn't it worth taking the time to do it right?

Spooging locks you in and cuts you off from possibility.  Don't blow your load just to get it down.  Take the time to just be with your idea, get to know it, buy it dinner, try new and different things, experiment, explore.  Invest at this early stage, and you may discover entire dimensions of possibilities you never even dreamed were possible, things that will elevate the concept to mind-blowing proportions.  Things that you would miss if you spooged.

And by elevating things at this stage, you elevate the final product.  And by elevating the final product (which, of course, was going to be brilliant as-is), you've made brilliance even more brilliant.  And how can that be bad?

Seriously.  Take time with your idea.  Let it grow and form and build.  If you do that, then by the time you're ready to nail the concept, it will be mind-blowing-eye-crossing awesome instead of just a boring moment of brilliant spooge.  

So think baseball.  Have a cold shower.  Hold back for God or the Queen, or whatever it takes to get you to slow down.  Like I said, the idea isn't going anywhere.  It's not attached to a time bomb that will make it go poof if you don't spooge it out and get onto the next stage.  Take your time.  The life and death stakes should be in your story, not in your head forcing you to barrel through the process like a teen boy seeing boob for the first time.  Your script has needs too.  Take your time to meet them.  It will make your script better.   And it won't make the baby Jesus cry.




 hot pic by Zawezome



1 comment:

  1. As I age, I've gotten to where I dwell on it a few days and write it in my head - although I don't do screenplays, but write lyrics and rant and rave blogs. I used to do short stories, but that's been awhile. I learned write and rewrite way too late in my songwriting career, but still can rewrite them now if I wish.

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